


A Special Illness

by Asterne_In_a_Sky, KMKH



Category: Fate/Zero, Fate/stay night & Related Fandoms
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Dialogue, Doctor/Patient, F/M, Some Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-30
Updated: 2018-06-30
Packaged: 2020-05-31 07:06:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19420933
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Asterne_In_a_Sky/pseuds/Asterne_In_a_Sky, https://archiveofourown.org/users/KMKH/pseuds/KMKH
Summary: This is the fourth time Gilgamesh goes to Dr. Arturia, demanding she cure his 'sickness'.





	A Special Illness

**Author's Note:**

> **Asterne_In_a_Sky** : based on tumblr assistant doctor meme. Enjoy the banter :3 
> 
> **KMKH** : we literally had one conversation, and it became a one-shot ;)

…

.

…

It was the fourth time in two weeks that Gilgamesh had come in as a patient, each time demanding to be visited by Doctor Arturia.

Since every single time there didn’t appear to be anything wrong with his health, she was quickly beginning to lose her patience. She could not however turn him away without visiting him first, because even though she knew the real reason why he kept coming back, she was extremely scrupulous and professional and the possibility that there could indeed be some undiscovered illness prevented her from ignoring him.

Gilgamesh knew this very well – in fact, he grudgingly admired this about her – and he took full advantage of it.

He was surprisingly quiet during the visit itself, allowing her to do her job without interference, but each time, right when she was about to check his heartbeat, he always started a conversation. A conversation that, against her better judgement, she participated in, unintentionally making it spiral into what could be considered a rather weird form of flirting.

Flirting she actually replied to, even if it happened without her meaning to do so.

He smirked widely at her as she positioned the stethoscope.

“Hmm, you should have noticed how my heartbeat is always faster than normal when you visit me. In fact, it should make you wonder why it keeps happening when you are here…”

Arturia always tried to steadfastly ignore what he was implying. Truly, she did _try_.

And every time, she failed.

“It’s true that your heartbeat is faster than average.”

His smirk seemed to widen even more.

“It certainly is, and I’m sure my pupils are more dilated than usual, too.”

There was a moment of silence, which only lasted until Arturia tersely questioned, “Is that the reason why you came today?”

“Why, yes. After all, it’s you who are responsible for this… condition.”

Inwardly, Arturia was facepalming, and she cleared her throat.

“Having a heartbeat that is slightly faster than average is no cause for concern.”

But of course, he was far from deterred.

“It is when you are the cause for it. As a doctor, should you not do your best to heal the patient?”

He truly did seem to enjoy those exchanges, but she wasn’t going to allow this peculiar predicament to continue.

“Not when I can see that the patient needs no treatment at all.”

He always had a reply, making sure their conversation didn’t end.

“I never said I needed _medical_ treatment. But as the doctor, you should know what kind of treatment the patient does need.”

She was starting to lose her patience.

“…If this anomalously fast heartbeat persists, perhaps I should recommend a sedative then.”

“Are you quite certain that’s what I need?”

“That depends. I’m positive it’s probably not what you _want_ , but doctors aren’t here to give you what you want.”

“Doctors are here to heal patients when something is unusual, and right now, my heartbeat is too fast. And at this rate, it will never stabilize. Which means that you cannot claim to be a very good doctor if you can’t heal me.”

With some effort, Arturia ignored the internal voice that was screaming at him to stop behaving like such a gigantic baby and just stay still to let her conclude her visit without any more interruptions. She knew from experience that if she didn’t give an answer, he could become even more loquacious.

“As a doctor, I do have a solution to offer, although I doubt you will agree with me. Since your heartbeat becomes abnormally fast when you are around me, I simply suggest that you stay away from me, and you will be completely fine.”

He looked almost offended at such a suggestion.

“You know perfectly well that it wouldn’t solve the problem at all. If I am separated from you, this condition will worsen and nobody will ever be able to cure me… except you.”

She was almost impressed.

“…Aren’t you quite the drama queen. I’m beginning to question whether you actually want to be cured at all.”

He stared at her intently for a few moments, studying her judiciously controlled expression. When he spoke again, his words were measured but full of purpose.

“I think some time with you and with a nice dinner would suffice for today.”

She did not like what he was not-so-subtly ordering to do.

“How can you be so certain we’ll be having a meal together today?”

“I’m confident we will make some time for ourselves.”

“Unfortunately for your plans, you’re not my only patient.”

Gilgamesh let out a sigh.

“Would you reconsider if I rephrased it by directly asking you out to dinner?”

Arturia raised an eyebrow and the sighed, her countenance turning stiff, unable to hide her disapproval.

“You are not the first one who tried to flirt with me during a visit.”

“Yet you can’t deny that I stand out.”

“You’re just very persistent,” she corrected him.

“I’d rather say that I’m very patient,” he countered, and her expression twisted in annoyance.

“That was a _horrible_ comment on your part.”

For all reply, he inclined his head and smirked at her. Finally removing the stethoscope from her ears, Arturia considered him.

“Would you stop booking unnecessary visits and continually interrupting them with these conversations if I agreed to dinner?”

“That would depend on your _actual_ reasons for accepting, _Doctor_ ,” he replied readily, almost taking her aback.

She paused as her hands automatically went to put the stethoscope away and her mind began to mull over his words.

Eventually, she turned to face him, examining him carefully.

“I have some conditions I’d like you to respect if we go out for dinner. No more medically questionable declarations about your heartbeat, no displays of arrogance towards the waiters, and please be so kind as to not call me ‘Doctor’ anymore.” She paused again. “In which case I would be glad to accept your rather… unconventional invitation.”

As soon as she was finished talking, Gilgamesh expression turned into a grin uncannily similar to a smile.

“You should probably be surprised by how delightfully agreeable your _conditions_ are to me. Very well then, it seems that we have a date… _Arturia_.”

…

.

…


End file.
